Justin Time

It's no secret I'm a devoted fan of Johnny Depp.

That's not to say I admire everything about Johnny, but there is plenty about him to admire. As someone once said, "I like the cut of his jib" (nautical term), but it's more than that.

One of my favorite bits of Johnny lore is the story he tells of himself as a 17-year-old newly-minted uncle to his sister's newborn daughter. Seems Johnny had just heard of the phenomenon of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, and he was terrified that his tiny niece would be struck by the mysterious malady.

So what did he do? Why, he slept in the floor beside her crib, of course, holding onto her little hand all night so she'd "remember to breathe." Ah ... you've got to love a teenaged boy who would even think of such a thing, let alone do it.

That's the Johnny who inspires my fangirl devotion. Also there's that pirate ... but I digress.

Thanks to my mom and her very neat, if slightly dysfunctional, Louisiana family, I have several truly wonderful uncles and aunts. My father was an only child, so my mother's two brothers, her sister, and their spouses were it for me, growing up. And because of our strange and peripatetic life with my mother's second husband, I saw relatively little of my aunts and uncles until I was myself a teenager.

It would be impossible for me to pick a favorite from among them; they're all awesome.

My Uncle Sherrill, a very talented, artistic, graceful and handsome man, had a first wife that I don't remember knowing. But his second wife, my Aunt Nancy, was so kind to me. She treated me like one of her own on the many occasions I stayed at her house. Unfortunately she didn't go the distance with my uncle, but he now has another lovely wife, my Aunt Judy, who is a marvelously warm and loving lady. I saw her recently and we fell to talking as if it hadn't been years since we'd seen one another.

My Aunt Linda and Uncle Don were like second parents to me. Uncle Don passed away in 2001, but I still remember how funny and original he was. I'll never forget the genuine interest he took in me throughout my life. He was good to my children too.

Aunt Linda's one of those people who is just easy to talk to, and as you don't find many of those, she is counted as a special blessing.

My mother's youngest sib, Dodie, was only ten when I was born. This past June when we all gathered for my mother's 70th birthday, Uncle Dodie told my kids that when I was a baby, he played with me just like I was a doll. I'm sure I caused more trouble than any doll would have, but he does not seem to remember that part.

I recall the adventurous and fun-loving boy he was, and I especially have fond memories of his first wife, Jean.

Uncle Dodie married Aunt Jean when they were both still teenagers, and although they were married for a long time, too many of the years were not happy ones for them. He has now been married for quite a while to his second wife, my Aunt Leslee, and she's a gem too.

But Aunt Jean was a good and special friend to me when I was growing up, and she explained a lot of important things to me. I was saddened to learn of her death a few months ago. Although I had not seen her in over thirty years, I miss her.

My sister had two little daughters at the time I got married, and in the few days before the wedding, the younger of them occupied a crib in the room where I slept. Only, she didn't sleep.

Genevieve required very little sleep!

I can still remember waking up in the night to her baby babblegurgles and, after giving my eyes time to adjust to the darkness, seeing her standing up in her crib, staring over at me. She was really something! I lay there hoping all babies didn't do that, because I'm attached to my sleep time.

Today Gena is a lovely young woman, but I always remember her as The Baby Who Wouldn't Go To Sleep. I hope she thinks of me as a nice and not-too-crazy aunt. My sister has seven children, ages 30 down to 13, and they are all important to me.

My husband has one brother and one sister, and between the two of them we have five nephews and four nieces. Through certain circumstances of life we have had an opportunity to get particularly close to two of our nephews, and they are like sons to us.

A third nephew is a favorite of mine, not because I have had the chance to get to know him all that well, but because the infrequent times I have been around him, he strikes me as a special young man. A young man of quality and integrity and goals, and a notably kind and considerate person.

His name is Justin.

Justin is college-age and at the present time he makes his home with his grandparents -- my mother-in-law and father-in-law -- in Northwest Ohio. His parents live too far from his college for him to stay with them, and he prefers not to live in the dorm, so he saves money by living with Grandma and Grandpa.

He also manages to be a great help to them in many ways.

One of the things Grandma made clear to Justin when he came to stay with them was, when Aunt Jenny and Uncle Greg come to visit (about twice a year, and never for very long), they get your room. You have to find somewhere else to stay while they are here.

I always feel badly about this -- kicking Justin out of his room -- but he never seems to mind.

This past Wednesday we moved into Justin's room for a two-day visit. As I was getting situated I noticed a piece of notebook paper lying on the bedside table. Because I'm nosy, I picked it up. Turns out it was a note to me and my husband:

Uncle Greg and Aunt Jenny,

You always seem to leave a note to which I seldom if ever have responded. This time I wanted to rest assured you were left with a greeting. It should be noted that you are in no way intruding and that if I had my own house you would be welcome any time. I'm not sure if our paths will cross this Thanksgiving. I will be in and out of town all week. We will be in touch I am sure some time soon. Happy Thanksgiving!

Love, Justin

I regret that our paths did not cross with Justin's this Thanksgiving. I left Justin a note, however, telling him we had missed him and that we are proud of him, and wishing him a Merry Christmas.

When I saw his mother, I told her that although I love all of her children, I have a special place in my heart for Justin. She replied that he feels the same way about me, and I can't tell you how much that meant to me. I hope my husband and I get a chance to encourage Justin in some way as the years go by, and I hope someday to be a great-aunt to his children.

On the May night three and a half years ago when our daughter, Stephanie, told us she was expecting our first grandchild, our other children were not there to hear the news. Before they arrived home I made a small card for each of them and folded it over once. When I gave them the cards I said, "In your absence you've all been given new names. Open your cards to read your new name."

One by one they obeyed, and this is what they read: "Uncle Andrew," "Aunt Audrey," and "Aunt Erica." As each of them "got it," they got all excited, and it's been fun to watch them interact with their little niece, Melanie.

So far they've worn the title well, and I'm glad, because the unconditional love of an aunt or an uncle can sometimes make all the difference.

Comments

[Deppfest]

As a proud Auntie myself, I know just where you're coming from! I love them all to bits and they do come to me at certain times for advice or just to talk things through. And yes, Johnny took my heart when I read that a couple of years ago. Such a sweet, considerate boy who has turned into a man any mother would be proud of.

[Jenny]

The relationship between an Aunt/Uncle and niece/nephew is indeed interesting. It's kind of like parents, only better in some ways! I'm sure Maarten is very fond indeed of his Aunt Carmel and Uncle Phil!