Baton Rouge calling

Where has she been? I can almost hear you thinking.
I have been in Baton Rouge. For yet another funeral.
Do you remember last October, when my Uncle Sherrill passed away?
And TG and I traveled down for the funeral, and we stayed with my mother's cousin, Darlene, and her husband Wayland, who makes homemade preserves, and biscuits in a little black iron skillet?
Well. Our beloved Darlene died in her sleep last Sunday night.
It was expected because she had been sick for a long time with COPD and various related complications, but it wasn't expected on Sunday night, if you know what I mean.
Darlene and Wayland had gone to bed and were holding hands and chatting, when Wayland drifted off to sleep.
He woke a few hours later to find that Darlene had drifted off to Heaven.
She's there now, and no oxygen tubes are needed or allowed, and her doting parents are holding her again.
Wayland watches the pallbearers
I know that reunion was a sight to behold. The angels rejoiced and so do we.
Although he cherishes Darlene's memory and loves Wayland as he loves all of my family, TG's dance card was full and he was not able to carry me to Baton Rouge.
So Erica volunteered. Isn't she a love? I will answer that: Yes.
On Monday afternoon I drove to her house in Atlanta. On Tuesday we drove to Louisiana and on Wednesday, after the funeral, we drove back to Atlanta.
I came home yesterday and that makes one thousand five hundred miles traveled in less than three days. I figure I was in the car for twenty-four of the sixty-nine hours I was gone from home.
Mama, Dody, Linda
But it was worth every mile and every minute, to be with my mom who is feeling acutely the loss of her beloved cousin after recently losing her brother, and to see my Aunt Linda and Uncle Dody again, also my sweet Aunt Judy, Uncle Sherrill's widow.
And of course to hug Wayland's neck and tell him we love him and are praying for him.
Then there's the fellowship after all is said and done, when families sit around eating delicious food prepared by church ladies, reminiscing, and there is so much laughter and also a few tears. It's all good.
Uncle Dody spoke at Darlene's funeral. I wish you could have been there to hear it.
Dody explained that Darlene's mother and his mother were sisters, and that as "only" cousins (because Darlene was an only child and her mother had only the one sister), they grew up together. Darlene was thirteen months older than Dody.
Uncle Dody
He told how, when he was a toddler, his mother (my Mamaw) got a job working for the State of Louisiana, and Darlene's mother, his aunt (my Great-Aunt Jenny), kept him during the day.
My Papaw dropped his boy Dody off at Aunt Jenny's house each morning. But rather than entering through the door, Dody says Aunt Jenny would open the window above her bed (where she was still snuggling with little Darlene), and Papaw handed Dody in through that window.
After snoozing for awhile longer, the three of them got up and Aunt Jenny made for Darlene and Dody a breakfast of fried eggs with saltine crackers crumbled on top.
Then it was playtime in the back yard for a couple of hours, after which Aunt Jenny summoned the children and handed them her six-pack metal Coca-Cola bottle carrier.
Darlene's son Jeremy
Dody and Darlene, holding hands, walked a block to Campo's store and bought six bottles of hot Coca-Cola. The cold bottles cost more.
Back home again, Aunt Jenny took two of the little Cokes and put them in the freezer.
Then it was face-washing time. Dody says Aunt Jenny's method was to soap up a washrag, then grab you by the back of the head and swab you good until you were gasping.
Dody said because Darlene was Aunt Jenny's own child, she got washed first. He was second so he got washed with part of Darlene's dirt.
Tending to graves
Then it was down for naps.
After naps, Aunt Jenny removed the Cokes from the freezer. By then a half-inch of ice had formed on top and they were perfectly cold. Darlene and Dody sat on the front porch and enjoyed their frosty beverages before resuming play in the back yard.
Darlene's father, my Great-Uncle Harold, was a carpenter. He had built for Darlene, his only baby, a to-scale playhouse that Dody says was nicer than the family's actual house.
Dody says Darlene served him so many imaginary cookies from her imaginary oven in the imaginary kitchen of her playhouse, he surely suffered from imaginary childhood obesity.
Slim and trim
Making and eating pretend cookies primed Darlene and Dody to accept the six cents apiece Aunt Jenny offered them later in the afternoon, when they would stand out in front and wait for the ice cream man to appear.
That would be a black man on a bicycle with a cold-box attached to the handlebars and a happy bell to ring.
Dody said the memories are so vivid. It was wonderful to hear him tell them.
After Darlene's graveside service we went over to the graves of my Mamaw and Papaw in the same cemetery, where my mother put fresh fake flowers.
Purple for remembrance
It was a beautiful day.
And I am glad to be home, and I hope you didn't have to go to a funeral this week.
That is all for now.
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Happy Ides of March ~ Happy Weekend
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Reader Comments (9)
Oh Jenny, I do realize that listening to wonderful memories makes it a little easier, but still a funeral does make one sad.I'm so sorry for your loss. My mother died on Dec. 17th and since I have been to 8 funerals. This weekend was the worst one on Friday, two on Sat. I'm funeral-ed out. My sister is not well, and I'm praying REALLY praying.
@irene ... you are right, dear Irene. That is too many funerals, especially in wintertime. Since death they say comes in threes, I am holding my breath. I hope it will be a long time until the next funeral, for both of us.
I'm so sorry to read of Darlene's passing. I know she wasn't doing well, but it sounded like Linda was more critical. Glad she passed peacefully and I'll add her family to my prayers. Funerals are a funny mix of sorrow, reminiscing and joy of being together. So glad you were able to be there and it was nice that Erica was able to go with you.
@Mari ... Aunt Linda is hanging in there but she has decided to forgo any treatment. She has a doctor appointment on Monday and will be asking some questions about what to expect. Her spirit is good and her attitude is excellent but the trip (she lives in Atlanta) to Baton Rouge was hard on her. Please keep her in your prayers; I know you will.
I don't like funerals. Never have. But I know as I get older...there'll be more of them. Some unexpected. Some not. None fun.
But I'm there. 'Cuz it's right that I am there. Those departed know. And remembrance is forever.
@SF ... agreed. I always say, if you don't go to folks' funerals, they won't come to yours. ;~D
And even if that weren't the case, it's just the right thing to do. I am glad I went. Precious memories.
I'm truly sorry Jenny...It's Never easy to say goodbye.
Loved the memories...and can just picture a baby being handed in through a bedroom window!
hughugs
@Donna ... isn't that a cute visual? I can just see it. And you're right: it's never easy to say goodbye.
I know everyone was glad that you were there, with your camera. At a time like this close family members are so overcome with sorrow and the weight of the moment....
Debbie
Right Truth
http://www.righttruth.typepad.com