Hot Dog Buns: $60
Thursday, August 28, 2008 at 11:44PM 
On the way home from a deposition today I remembered the unopened package of Oscar Meyer XXL Premium Beef Hot Dogs chilling in our fridge. Those puppies are REALLY good.
So I thought to myself, I'll stop by the store and buy a package of hot dog buns. Maybe Erica will cook up a box of Kraft Deluxe Shells and Cheese and we will be so there, dinnerwise.
Note to Self: Better keep the blinds drawn or Food Network will be waving fountain pens in my face by tomorrow morning. I don't need that hassle.
But seriously ... how sizeable a dent should my relatively insignificant culinary strategy have made in the Weber coffers? Anyone?
Surely not sixty dollars. And change.
My mind seized on the idea of making a big pot of actual chili for dinner tomorrow.
Seems I need an offshore bank account just to go grocery shopping these days.
To quote my mother for the second time today: "It's like baloney ... you can cut it off anywhere."
Or maybe it's my head I should cut off ... because see, if I walk into the grocery store, one thing is going to lead to another and next thing you know, judging by the haul of vittles in my waggly-wheeled cart, I'm expecting Patton's Third Army -- and their mothers, and their mothers' old boyfriends -- for a protracted house party.
It had its genesis in the bread aisle, where I went to find the hot dog buns. Cruising into another big holiday weekend with company beginning to arrive this very night in the form of daughter Audrey, I thought it prudent to stock the larder with a loaf of bread. Only, one wasn't enough (we do love our toast and coffee of a morning) so I got two.
While leaving that aisle heading for the chips and snacks area -- because I had decided that with our hot dogs and shells 'n cheese we also needed some Sweet Spicy Chili Doritos -- my mind seized on the idea of making a big pot of actual chili for dinner tomorrow.
Which called for the purchase of a one-pound bag of Santitas tortilla chips along with the Doritos ... then over several aisles to locate chili hot beans and chili seasoned diced tomatoes, and a chili seasoning packet. And while in the spice aisle I grabbed a shaker of coarse-grind black pepper. Don't want to run short on that.
I proceeded to the back of the store to find the ground chuck for the chili. While in that vicinity I decided to stock up on weightless boxes of pre-cooked bacon (to go on that toasted bread, smothered by big juicy tomato slices) and a few extra bags of flash-frozen boneless, skinless chicken tenderloins. Can't have too many of those on hand.
At the checkout counter I selected a Women's Health magazine that promises that if I read page 87, my tummy will be flatter in nine days.
Oh, and I got a box of Good 'n Plentys. Little pink-and-white happy pellets. Just because.
Please pass the mustard.
Reader Comments (17)
Finally! Another black licorice lover! Or maybe you only like it if it's coated with pepto-bismol pink and white candy...those are fabulous...but either way, go you! Black licorice lovers represent!! :-)
I walk to the store with cash, only a few more dollars than I need, and then I can't be tempted.
@ Angi ... yeah girl! I pick out all the black jellybeans first, and yum-yum them right on down my goozlepipe. Only sometimes I have to fight my mom for them. Maybe love of black licorice is genetic. Did one of your parents carry the gene?
@ WD ... that is an excellent idea -- both the walking and the cash part -- and one I should try!
They say never to go grocery shopping when you're hungry. Were you hungry? LOL
I've always wondered who "they" was in all those "They say" sentences.
@ LL ... believe it or not I was not particularly hungry! Well, no hungrier than usual ... and you know, "they" may very well be my mom.
I was thinking about you this morning ... no joke ... and told myself I need to stop by your blog. I promise to do that before I sleep tonight. Thanks for reading, luv.
Instead of having a store filled with only hot dog buns, they put all those other items in it as well.
See, THAT is how they get you...
@ Kev ... exactly! Then they just sit back and wait for higly susceptible ninnies like me to drive by. They don't have to wait long.
I think you may be onto something. My mom doesn't care for black licorice, my sister HATES it...and my dad? He's OBSESSED with it.
He got me hooked on BlackJack gum (remember that stuff?) when I was like 6 years old. The rest is history...
Oh, black liquorice!! ME ME ME!!! I have recently discovered Australian 'soft-eating' black liquorice, and I tell you, it's hard not to eat the whole bag at once. Don't bother with the fancy flavours. Black is the only colour for liquorice.
I'm like you in the supermarket. I only go in for one thing and suddenly I'm wishing I'd brought my stash of bags...
OMG, I do this in the store. Especially lately. I walk in to buy a bunch of bananas, and suddenly I'm seized by the fear that they're going to stop carrying the organic burritos I like or the fat-free yogurt or the multi-grain tortilla chips. And before I know it the check-out clerk says, "That will be $94.37."
@ Angi ... I do remember BlackJack gum! And also Teaberry ...
@ Jay ... I want me some of that Australian licorice! I am close to insatiable when it comes to licorice. I wonder if Johnny likes it ...
@ Ruth ... You too? Isn't it awful? If I spend an hour in a grocery store, you do not want to know how much it will cost ... but I will say, it will go into triple digits. Not counting the zeros. There's just too much good food available to buy!
I canNOT go into a store and pick up just a few things. It's like going into a bakery and buying just one donut.
Hot dogs and macaroni and cheese? That's my FLAVORITE dinner combo ever!
@ JD ... well, that's good to know, for the happy day I have to feed you! And WHO in the sam hill goes into a bakery to buy ONE donut ... or ONE of ANYTHING? Sheesh! That's like saying, that Johnny Depp sure has one pretty eyelash. DUH.
I like wondering if I'm going to make the $25 minimum needed to get the special price on the 4-day only deals and wind up spending $60. Without fail!
Watched the montage and the youtube video of 'Smile' with Josh. He's not sexy like our Johnny, but boy is he cute and so talented.
@ Cheryl ... agreed about Josh ... I have a child his age so I don't see him as sexy, but his voice always gives me chills! He is a phenomenal talent.
I do the same thing in the grocery store. It's because you're just making sure you have enough for others (mainly kids for me and their constant guests).
I don't like to be caught empty-handed (or empty pantried). I enjoy having plenty in the house for all to eat and enjoy. And the magazine plus Good 'n Plenty...you gotta take time to relax yourself after all the food you'll be providing!
@ Keli ... "empty-pantried" ... LOLOLOL! I love that! A bad way to be, indeed. Not good ... and yes, after looking after everyone else, I need a treat and a magazine break! I'm not shy about taking what I need either. I don't allow myself to play the martyr.