Bring Me That Horizon

Welcome to jennyweber dot com

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Home of Jenny the Pirate

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Our four children

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Our eight grandchildren

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This will go better if you

check your expectations at the door.

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We're not big on logic

but there's no shortage of irony.

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 Nice is different than good.

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Oh and ...

I flunked charm school.

So what.

Can't write anything.

> Jennifer <

Causing considerable consternation
to many fine folk since 1957

Pepper and me ... Seattle 1962

  ​

Welcome Aboard
Do Tell, Dearie
In The Market, As It Were

 

 

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Contributor to

American Cemetery

published by Kates-Boylston

Hoist The Colors

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Insist on yourself; never imitate.

Your own gift you can present

every moment

with the cumulative force

of a whole life’s cultivation;

but of the adopted talent of another

you have only an extemporaneous

half possession.

That which each can do best,

none but his Maker can teach him.

> Ralph Waldo Emerson <

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Represent:

The Black Velvet Coat

Belay That!

This blog does not contain and its author will not condone profanity, crude language, or verbal abuse. Commenters, you are welcome to speak your mind but do not cuss or I will delete either the word or your entire comment, depending on my mood. Continued use of bad words or inappropriate sentiments will result in the offending individual being banned, after which they'll be obliged to walk the plank. Thankee for your understanding and compliance.

> Jenny the Pirate <

A Pistol With One Shot

Ecstatically shooting everything in sight using my beloved Nikon D3100 with AF-S DX Nikkor 18-55mm 1:3.5-5.6G VR kit lens and AF-S Nikkor 50mm f/1.8 G prime lens.

Also capturing outrageous beauty left and right with my Nikon D7000 blissfully married to my Nikkor 85mm f/1.4D AF prime glass. Don't be jeal.

And then there was the Nikon AF-S DX NIKKOR 18-200mm f:3.5-5.6G ED VR II zoom. We're done here.

Dying Is A Day Worth Living For

I am a taphophile

Word. Photo Jennifer Weber 2010

Great things are happening at

Find A Grave

If you don't believe me, click the pics.

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Dying is a wild night

and a new road.

Emily Dickinson

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REMEMBRANCE

When I am gone

Please remember me

 As a heartfelt laugh,

 As a tenderness.

 Hold fast to the image of me

When my soul was on fire,

The light of love shining

Through my eyes.

Remember me when I was singing

And seemed to know my way.

Remember always

When we were together

And time stood still.

Remember most not what I did,

Or who I was;

Oh please remember me

For what I always desired to be:

A smile on the face of God.

David Robert Brooks

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 Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.

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Keep To The Code

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You Want To Find This
The Promise Of Redemption

Therefore seeing we have this ministry, as we have received mercy, we faint not;

But have renounced the hidden things of dishonesty, not walking in craftiness, nor handling the word of God deceitfully; but by manifestation of the truth commending ourselves to every man's conscience in the sight of God.

But if our gospel be hid, it is hid to them that are lost:

In whom the god of this world hath blinded the minds of them which believe not, lest the light of the glorious gospel of Christ, who is the image of God, should shine unto them.

For we preach not ourselves, but Christ Jesus the Lord; and ourselves your servants for Jesus' sake.

For God, who commanded the light to shine out of darkness, hath shined in our hearts, to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.

But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us.

We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair;

Persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed;

Always bearing about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life also of Jesus might be made manifest in our body.

For we which live are alway delivered unto death for Jesus' sake, that the life also of Jesus might be made manifest in our mortal flesh.

So then death worketh in us, but life in you.

We having the same spirit of faith, according as it is written, I BELIEVED, AND THEREFORE HAVE I SPOKEN; we also believe, and therefore speak;

Knowing that he which raised up the Lord Jesus shall raise up us also by Jesus, and shall present us with you.

For all things are for your sakes, that the abundant grace might through the thanksgiving of many redound to the glory of God.

For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day.

For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory;

While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal.

II Corinthians 4

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THE DREAMERS

In the dawn of the day of ages,
 In the youth of a wondrous race,
 'Twas the dreamer who saw the marvel,
 'Twas the dreamer who saw God's face.


On the mountains and in the valleys,
By the banks of the crystal stream,
He wandered whose eyes grew heavy
With the grandeur of his dream.

The seer whose grave none knoweth,
The leader who rent the sea,
The lover of men who, smiling,
Walked safe on Galilee --

All dreamed their dreams and whispered
To the weary and worn and sad
Of a vision that passeth knowledge.
They said to the world: "Be glad!

"Be glad for the words we utter,
Be glad for the dreams we dream;
Be glad, for the shadows fleeing
Shall let God's sunlight beam."

But the dreams and the dreamers vanish,
The world with its cares grows old;
The night, with the stars that gem it,
Is passing fair, but cold.

What light in the heavens shining
Shall the eye of the dreamer see?
Was the glory of old a phantom,
The wraith of a mockery?

Oh, man, with your soul that crieth
In gloom for a guiding gleam,
To you are the voices speaking
Of those who dream their dream.

If their vision be false and fleeting,
If its glory delude their sight --
Ah, well, 'tis a dream shall brighten
The long, dark hours of night.

> Edward Sims Van Zile <

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Freedom is a fragile thing and is never more than one generation away from extinction. It is not ours by inheritance; it must be fought for and defended constantly by each generation, for it comes only once to a people. Those who have known freedom and then lost it, have never known it again.

~ Ronald Reagan

Photo Jennifer Weber 2010

I Knew You'd Warm Up To Me (recent scribblings)
Not Without My Effects

Very Fast. Nigh Uncatchable.
My Compass Works Fine

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The Courage Of Our Hearts

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Daft Like Jack

 "I can name fingers and point names ..."

And We'll Sing It All The Time
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That Dog Is Never Going To Move

~ RIP JAVIER ~

1999 - 2016

Columbia's Finest Chihuahua

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~ RIP SHILOH ~

2017 - 2021

My Tar Heel Granddog

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~ RIP RAMBO ~

2008 - 2022

Andrew's Beloved Pet

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Saturday
Sep252010

Sacher? Linzer? Donner? Blitzen? Make mine walnut and keep the coffee coming, chop chop!

DateSaturday, September 25, 2010 at 11:44AM

I should be working ... well, I was working but I had to stop and share this with you while I was still laughing about it.

If you don't like it when I make fun of the way people fold, spindle, mutilate, and otherwise abuse the English language, now is the time to leave.

If you like to chuckle and/or maybe even learn something, stick around.

So I'm looking over an exhibit to a deposition -- in this case an indignant letter from the president of a company that's about to be sued, written to the lawyer whose client is about to sue said company -- and what to my wondering eye should appear but this priceless sentence:

It appears from your letter that you are not sure what you are asking us to be responsible for, however I thought it well to remind you of the tortes of malicious prosecution and/or abuse of process and request that you and your client act in a rationed and reasoned manner before a determination is made to institute action against blah, blah, blah ...

To quote Captain Hector Barbossa, late of the Black Pearl: "There were a lot of long words in there, missy! We're naught but humble pirates."

Okay ... so much to make fun of, so little time. I'll concentrate on the most egregious crime committed error perpetrated by our outraged would-be counter-litigant -- who, by the way, DID get sued, but clearly for the wrong "rationed reasons."

People. A torte is a cake. You can look it up.

A tort is a civil wrong in law. You can look that up too.

So I do believe it is safe to say that there is no such animal as a cake of malicious prosecution. 

And even if there were, to quote Willy Wonka: "Eww! No one would buy it!"

That is all.

I must get back to work. It is painfully obvious that someone has been grievously caked wronged and there are great matters of cake law to be decided in this lawsuit.

Now I'm getting hungry.

AuthorJennifer | Comment9 Comments |

Reader Comments (9)

Now I feel I should bake something. You're too funny.

September 25, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterirene

-giggles- Even if the guy is *Spelling Challenged,* he must have access to a Spell Checker. If he's the president of a company, and all.

Gentle hugs,
From this 'Aunt,' who is being 'Sweet Aunt Bridget', for the day.

September 25, 2010 | Unregistered Commenter'Aunt Amelia'

Back to work, ye scurvy pirate!

September 25, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSue the hobbit

If you ever ate my mother's cooking, you would understand how a cake may have a attributes of malicious persecution.

September 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDonna M.

Ack, I meant to say "the attributes"!

September 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDonna M.

Gotta watch out for those malicious desserts! They'll get you every time, correctamundo?

September 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa B.

Love text messages? Do we even want to know? Spam alert!!!!!

September 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSue the hobbit

Errors like these make me laugh. People don't seem to realize that seemlingly innocent spelling/grammar errors are usually SERIOUSLY detrimental to their case. Resumes are my favorite...

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAngi

Oh I knew "tort" vs "torte", but read right over it.

There are long winded lawyers and those that are precise and brief. I've worked for both and all in between. Walter P. Armstrong, Jr., head of the firm could say everything he wanted to say in just a few sentences. I love that. I worked for him for 5 years. Jon McCalla on the other hand, was so long winded no one wanted to work for him. He's now a sixth circuit judge I think. Oh my. I only had to work for him occasionally.

September 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDebbie

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