Who's going to be my baby now

Here's the deal.

I'm in this luxurious hotel room in Knoxville and the bed is scrumptious and it's deliciously cool and I am very tired. Or at least I thought I was.

TG is snoring and everyone here at the Hilton has been so nice to see to our comfort. But I can't sleep.

There's a supermoon outside the window, levitating above the skyline and the foothills of the Blue Ridge.

And my baby, my Andrew, is all grown up. No longer a college man, as of tomorrow -- wait, what am I saying? As of today, he is a college graduate.

Well, sort of. There is a matter of an interim class he must take this summer, and a course or two online to finish up. Trifles.

Five years ago he raised his right hand on a rainy April morning at McGhee Tyson Airbase in Knoxville and was inducted into the United States Air Force, Tennessee Air Guard.

In July 2007 he went to basic training in San Antonio, then to tech school in Biloxi. In January 2008 he began studying Youth Ministries at Crown College of the Bible, a ministry of Temple Baptist Church.

For five years my baby boy has balanced the demands of work, classes, family, and duty to his country.

The Air Force has plucked him from his studies not only for one drill weekend per month, but also for random deployments that often take him out of state for anywhere from a few days to several weeks at a time.

For the last year he has served as Director of Youth Camps at Mount Moriah Christian Camp and Conference Center, a ministry of Temple Baptist Church.

I am grateful to say that not only has my son handled all of the above with a gracious and generous spirit (most of the time) and the work ethic that has amazed us since he got his first job at age eight, but he has been faithful to serve the Lord throughout these years.

And even if it offends somebody who doesn't understand -- and never could -- how much this means to me and to their father, I am grateful for the existence of a college that unapologetically trains young people for the ministry while adhering to the old traditional paths of service and standards.

Because Andrew is the fourth of our four children to graduate from this college. Our honorary fifth kid, our fine son-in-law, is a distinguished graduate as well.

In case you didn't know, there are lots of different kinds of Bible colleges.

Some unabashedly and openly claim to be "the greatest" Christian universities on the face of Planet Earth. As if that can be quantified.

But the problem is, at some such Bible colleges students saunter around campus dressed like hippies or bums or worse, and you need earplugs to survive a chapel service -- not because of the animation of the preacher, but due to the decibel level of the drums and guitars being beaten furiously so as to entertain and "promote worship."

At some such colleges young men and women live in much the same way as is seen on the campuses of state universities, where immorality is rampant.

At some so-called "Christian" universities, the sports programs are worshiped as much or more than the Lord could ever be.

At some faith-based universities and colleges, professors teach that it's okay for a Christian to take a drink once in awhile, and we needn't get our knickers all in a twist about it because, you know, everything in moderation and besides, Jesus made wine.

Hogwash.

Let me tell you a story or two. You have time, right? Because I am wide awake and full of information.

Andrew played soccer throughout college. Goalie! The child flung himself in so many different directions protecting that goal, it's a wonder his head is still on his shoulders.

When his team lost and he got the blame, he took the raspberries good-naturedly, then called his dad to vent his exasperation about the loss and some of the referee calls, and his own shortcomings.

On one occasion a few years back, TG and I attended one of his soccer games at a Christian college in another state.

When the soccer game was concluded we made our way to the gym to watch some girls' volleyball.

There was a band situated in the bleachers of this Bible college gym and they played at every available opportunity.

Now, you can believe me or not, but I didn't expect them to play Amazing Grace at a ball game. I'm cool like that. I'm not a stick-in-the-mud; I even have a few Tony Bennett CDs.

But neither did I expect them to play music so worldly, so raucous, so sensual as to make us feel as though we'd strayed into a raunchy bar by mistake.

If that were the only stripe of Bible or Christian college available, my kids' formal education would have ended with graduation from high school. I thank God there was a Crown College of the Bible for my chilren to attend and call their alma mater.

I guess I should be glad that this particular faith-based college I mentioned, along with many others, has long since removed the offensive and divisive words "Christian" and "Bible" from their name altogether.

Just like many churches have decided it would be prudent to remove the word "Baptist" or even "Church" from their names, so as to appeal to those who are afraid or suspicious of those rigid terms.

It's just as well that they have because the leftward liberal drift of these institutions has become so pronounced, the only thing Christian left about them was the name.

Crown College of the Bible in Powell-Knoxville, Tennessee, is not a perfect place by any means. Our first kid enrolled there in 1998 and I can remember at least four times over these years that either TG or I have felt the need to write or call the powers that be, in order to air a grievance or straighten out a problem.

But how many people can say that over a span of fourteen years, each time they visit the campus where their children are students, they come away blessed by the surroundings and by the message and what they consistently perceive to be a sincere intent to glorify and worship God in the beauty of holiness, in accordance with the Scriptural command?

Conservative Christianity is an elusive thing nowadays, and becoming increasingly so. It's been some time since it was fashionable or popular for Christians in a higher academic environment to steer hard right, to embrace a modest dress code, to insist that young people are properly chaperoned, to issue demerits for infractions on the rules, and not to apologize for any of it, and not to back down because some people think it's puritanical, narrow, unrealistic, or legalistic.

It is none of those things.

I am so tired of people accusing those who pursue a higher standard in their lives, and who, for all their human failings, refuse to take the path of least resistance but instead choose the high road, of being legalists.

Legalism is not defined as believing we should live by a long list of do's and don'ts.

Legalism is the belief that one obtains salvation through good works. Period. As opposed to salvation by grace through faith alone, and that not of ourselves, as clearly taught in Scripture.

So stop, please stop calling conservative Christians who have decided to put a finer point on standards of dress and behavior than you do, legalists. They're not.

OK now I sense some eyes glazing over and I don't blame you at all but I'm not done. Just one more story. Make that one and a half.

When we checked into our hotel room I went straight to the window because I always do that. I'm happiest when near a window.

I surveyed the familiar skyline and picked out, as I always do, the two skyscrapers I worked in when we lived here.

Twenty years ago almost to the day, I took a job at a law firm in a building that is so close out this hotel room window, I can almost touch it. It's just to the right of that church steeple.

I didn't want to go to work; in fact, it broke my heart. Not only am I a lazy sort of person who likes to wake up late and slowly and linger over coffee, but my baby Andrew was only three and I was going to have to take him to a babysitter.

I don't believe in sending kids to daycare. If that makes you mad, please do click out. Not one of my kids ever spent so much as an hour in daycare.

They were, however, cared for on an as-needed basis by one or two stellar babysitters -- mothers, mature women with a God-given gift for nurturing children not their own. They didn't do it for money, even though I paid them very well. They did it because they loved the kids they watched.

Such was Tracy, a precious lady here in Knoxville who cared for Andrew for that year before he was old enough for K-4. She had a son Andrew's age and they became little buddies. Everything worked out beautifully. They are still friends and God is still good.

Tonight -- well, last night actually, because now it's a new day -- after the baccalaureate service for Andrew's class, Tracy's lovely eldest daughter came and flung her arms around my neck, her cute face lit with a smile and her warm brown eyes just glowing.

She and her new husband, who is graduating with Andrew and who jumps over lined-up buses on a motorcycle and whom she was anxious for me to meet, are going to England as missionaries.

It made me so happy to rejoice with Joy on her marriage, and to confirm once again that God is faithful.

And then there was Shirley. I had just gotten situated in my seat when TG touched my arm. "Look who's here to see you," he said.

I looked up into some of the kindest eyes I've ever known. I met Shirley twenty years ago when I worked at the law firm in the building I can see even now through the window, lit and limned by the impossibly bright and high moon.

Shirley didn't work at the law firm; she worked for a company that took care of the many potted palms and other exotic plants that adorned our sleek and modern office space.

So once a week I'd see Shirley trotting around the office with her watering can and whatnot, green thumb in high gear, invariably with a shy smile on her pretty face. Little bitty blonde thing, she is.

We got to talking one day and we discovered we were both professing Christians, and that was all she wrote and we've been girlfriends ever since.

One of the first things Shirley ever told me was that at her church, just about all they ever did anymore was sing. They'd been conservative but then the worldly music crept in and they added a bunch of instruments and organized several performing groups and next thing she and her husband knew, the services were all concerts and no conviction. They knew it wasn't good for them.

I told Shirley about our church, Temple Baptist Church, all those years ago, and I encouraged her to visit. I thought she and her husband would like the traditional hymn-based song service followed by the preaching of a Bible message, every single Sunday without fail, like the sun coming up in the east and setting in the west.

Shirley and her husband accepted my invitation and eventually they moved their membership, and they have been members ever since. Each time I am in town she comes to find me, and she hugs me at least twice, and she thanks me for telling her about the church she loves.

I am always awed by that, because I didn't want to be in the place I had to be every day, working in that law firm in downtown Knoxville, but if I hadn't been there, I would never have met Shirley.

In case you're wondering, I don't bill myself as a great or even a good Christian. What I relate about my church or any church, and the college where my children were fortunate enough to attend, and my personal experiences, is never meant as bragging.

I do not delude myself that I have everything there is to figure out, figured out. But I know some things I have figured out, and I'm as sure of them as I am of my own name, and I won't back down, as my late Pastor Kelley used to say, "until the clods hit my box."

What I am and all I'll ever be is a sinner saved by grace, grateful for that salvation, stumbling and falling as often as I walk, but always leaning on the Lord Whose death, burial, and resurrection made everything possible for me.

Into the mix on this momentous occasion I cannot help but be grateful for other conservative Christians -- and yes, Baptists, and not afraid or ashamed to call themselves that -- who as members of a local New Testament church have sacrificed to provide a Bible college that was for my children, more about influence than about academics.

My son will march into that auditorium tonight in his cap and gown, near the end of the line because he's a Dubya, and he'll have tears in his eyes I know because like me, he loves ceremony.

He told us tonight -- make that last night -- over a late but delicious dinner at Cracker Barrel, that he doesn't even know who the Torians of his class are.

I got it right away. "You mean Valedic and Saluta?" I asked.

Then we all roared with laughter. Yes, we are easily amused. And sure, I wish my son were giving a speech at graduation tonight. But he won't be. He passed his courses and he has been busy and believe me it was no mean feat. It is enough.

Now it's past three in the morning and the first birdies of the day are chirping outside the window. Tiredness is creeping up on me and you've been most attentive and no, it's not the altitude causing me to chase rabbits all over the moonlight-drenched East Tennessee landscape.

I'm just a mother, sleepless in Knoxville, reminiscing on the end of an era, wondering who's going to be my baby now.

Comments

[glenda]

My friend, you are up so late...er.....EARLY..,but, what a beautiful tribute to your BABY. Trouble is, he looks like a handsome man now. So grown up, but he will always be your baby. He has accomplished so much, and you and TG have so many reasons to be proud!! From one sinner saved by Grace to another dear friend, enjoy the ceremony tonight that puts your Baby into the place he has worked hard to be. I'll be thinking of all of you and sitting right there with you ( in absentia of course). Get your beauty rest now, as if you needed Beauty rest, and wake up to a steaming, hot, strong cuppa coffee!! ............G.

[Mari]

Congratulations to your Andrew! You are rightfully proud of him and I appreciate the tribute you wrote here. I'm proud of him and I'm not even family!
Sounds like a college to be thankful for. We have near us 2 Christian colleges - however, I wouldn't want my kids going there. They profess to be Christian, but the things taught there are not so much - kind of a wolf in sheeps clothing kind of deal.
Enjoy your day - hug your baby, smile and cry a little too. I know you will!

[Donna (Texas)]

Awwwww....a Mother's love for her Baby... He's So Handsome too! Congratulations to him for all his hard work and graduation!!! You two did Good Girl!!
hughugs

[irene]

Congratulations to Andrew and to you and TG, you've graduated too. I feel your pain girl, my little one will be walking down in his gown this fall. When did this happen, and how could we be old enough to have such big boys?

[Skunkfeathers]

Your kids will always be your babies, even when they're anything but anymore.

As for standards...it's nice to see people with them. One particular ideology hereabouts seems to askew and belittle them. Which explains liberal conduct.