Bring Me That Horizon

Welcome to jennyweber dot com

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Home of Jenny the Pirate

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Our four children

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Our eight grandchildren

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This will go better if you

check your expectations at the door.

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We're not big on logic

but there's no shortage of irony.

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 Nice is different than good.

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Oh and ...

I flunked charm school.

So what.

Can't write anything.

> Jennifer <

Causing considerable consternation
to many fine folk since 1957

Pepper and me ... Seattle 1962

  

In The Market, As It Were

 

 

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Contributor to

American Cemetery

published by Kates-Boylston

Hoist The Colors

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Insist on yourself; never imitate.

Your own gift you can present

every moment

with the cumulative force

of a whole life’s cultivation;

but of the adopted talent of another

you have only an extemporaneous

half possession.

That which each can do best,

none but his Maker can teach him.

> Ralph Waldo Emerson <

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Represent:

The Black Velvet Coat

Belay That!

This blog does not contain and its author will not condone profanity, crude language, or verbal abuse. Commenters, you are welcome to speak your mind but do not cuss or I will delete either the word or your entire comment, depending on my mood. Continued use of bad words or inappropriate sentiments will result in the offending individual being banned, after which they'll be obliged to walk the plank. Thankee for your understanding and compliance.

> Jenny the Pirate <

A Pistol With One Shot

Ecstatically shooting everything in sight using my beloved Nikon D3100 with AF-S DX Nikkor 18-55mm 1:3.5-5.6G VR kit lens and AF-S Nikkor 50mm f/1.8 G prime lens.

Also capturing outrageous beauty left and right with my Nikon D7000 blissfully married to my Nikkor 85mm f/1.4D AF prime glass. Don't be jeal.

And then there was the Nikon AF-S DX NIKKOR 18-200mm f:3.5-5.6G ED VR II zoom. We're done here.

Dying Is A Day Worth Living For

I am a taphophile

Word. Photo Jennifer Weber 2010

Great things are happening at

Find A Grave

If you don't believe me, click the pics.

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Dying is a wild night

and a new road.

Emily Dickinson

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REMEMBRANCE

When I am gone

Please remember me

 As a heartfelt laugh,

 As a tenderness.

 Hold fast to the image of me

When my soul was on fire,

The light of love shining

Through my eyes.

Remember me when I was singing

And seemed to know my way.

Remember always

When we were together

And time stood still.

Remember most not what I did,

Or who I was;

Oh please remember me

For what I always desired to be:

A smile on the face of God.

David Robert Brooks

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 Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.

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Keep To The Code

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You Want To Find This
The Promise Of Redemption

Therefore seeing we have this ministry, as we have received mercy, we faint not;

But have renounced the hidden things of dishonesty, not walking in craftiness, nor handling the word of God deceitfully; but by manifestation of the truth commending ourselves to every man's conscience in the sight of God.

But if our gospel be hid, it is hid to them that are lost:

In whom the god of this world hath blinded the minds of them which believe not, lest the light of the glorious gospel of Christ, who is the image of God, should shine unto them.

For we preach not ourselves, but Christ Jesus the Lord; and ourselves your servants for Jesus' sake.

For God, who commanded the light to shine out of darkness, hath shined in our hearts, to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.

But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us.

We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair;

Persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed;

Always bearing about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life also of Jesus might be made manifest in our body.

For we which live are alway delivered unto death for Jesus' sake, that the life also of Jesus might be made manifest in our mortal flesh.

So then death worketh in us, but life in you.

We having the same spirit of faith, according as it is written, I BELIEVED, AND THEREFORE HAVE I SPOKEN; we also believe, and therefore speak;

Knowing that he which raised up the Lord Jesus shall raise up us also by Jesus, and shall present us with you.

For all things are for your sakes, that the abundant grace might through the thanksgiving of many redound to the glory of God.

For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day.

For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory;

While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal.

II Corinthians 4

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THE DREAMERS

In the dawn of the day of ages,
 In the youth of a wondrous race,
 'Twas the dreamer who saw the marvel,
 'Twas the dreamer who saw God's face.


On the mountains and in the valleys,
By the banks of the crystal stream,
He wandered whose eyes grew heavy
With the grandeur of his dream.

The seer whose grave none knoweth,
The leader who rent the sea,
The lover of men who, smiling,
Walked safe on Galilee --

All dreamed their dreams and whispered
To the weary and worn and sad
Of a vision that passeth knowledge.
They said to the world: "Be glad!

"Be glad for the words we utter,
Be glad for the dreams we dream;
Be glad, for the shadows fleeing
Shall let God's sunlight beam."

But the dreams and the dreamers vanish,
The world with its cares grows old;
The night, with the stars that gem it,
Is passing fair, but cold.

What light in the heavens shining
Shall the eye of the dreamer see?
Was the glory of old a phantom,
The wraith of a mockery?

Oh, man, with your soul that crieth
In gloom for a guiding gleam,
To you are the voices speaking
Of those who dream their dream.

If their vision be false and fleeting,
If its glory delude their sight --
Ah, well, 'tis a dream shall brighten
The long, dark hours of night.

> Edward Sims Van Zile <

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Freedom is a fragile thing and is never more than one generation away from extinction. It is not ours by inheritance; it must be fought for and defended constantly by each generation, for it comes only once to a people. Those who have known freedom and then lost it, have never known it again.

~ Ronald Reagan

Photo Jennifer Weber 2010

Not Without My Effects

My Compass Works Fine

The Courage Of Our Hearts

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Daft Like Jack

 "I can name fingers and point names ..."

And We'll Sing It All The Time
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That Dog Is Never Going To Move

~ RIP JAVIER ~

1999 - 2016

Columbia's Finest Chihuahua

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~ RIP SHILOH ~

2017 - 2021

My Tar Heel Granddog

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~ RIP RAMBO ~

2008 - 2022

Andrew's Beloved Pet

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Friday
Aug262011

Don't take me for a fluo-ride

Yesterday I did one of my favorite things:

I had my teeth cleaned.

Just kidding.

About it being one of my favorite things, that is.

However, now that I've found my Happy Dental Home (my dentist's words, no lie), even my less-favorite things are better than they used to be.

For example, due to a hard-fought battle won (by me) nearly two years ago, I am no longer subjected to even the merest suggestion that I indulge in an apres-dental-hygiene-appointment fluoride swish.

Beth, the adorable and sweet hygienist who took care of me yesterday, eyed my chart for a few seconds, then said:

"No fluoride for you, right?"

Right! Let's sing it in unison!

No fluoride for Jenny!

I've trained them well.

This post from November of 2009 -- when I had a completely different dentist -- will explain why.

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I visited my dentist's office on Monday for a routine teeth cleaning.

The practice charges $119 for one of their excellent hygienists to perform this service.

So naturally, when the ordeal procedure was over and I went up front to pay, clutching my plastic goody bag of two extra-soft toothbrushes, a quarter-sized disc of dental floss, and a runt tube of toothpaste, I expected the receptionist/cashier to say: "The charge is one hundred nineteen dollars today, Mrs. Weber."

Or, "That'll be one hundred nineteen today."

Or, "A hundred and nineteen dollars, please."

Or at the very least, "One nineteen."

But she didn't say any of those things.

Cool as an out-of-order Cavitron she enunciated, and I quote: "That will be two-oh-three."

Two-oh-three what? Dollars? For a one-hundred-nineteen-dollar cleaning?

Something seemed to have gone awry.

I looked behind me to see if perhaps I had inadvertently volunteered to pay for someone else's dental services in addition to my own.

Seeing no one, I asked the extortionist receptionist to explain.

"You had a fluoride rinse and an exam today too," she said.

Well, yes. Yes, I suppose I did enjoy a fluoride rinse. My, was it ever tasty.

Following my cleaning I'd been instructed to swish for 60 seconds with a half-ounce of blue mouthwash that the hygienist dispensed into a plastic thimble from a gallon jug with a pump on the top.

Turns out that half-ounce swish cost me $36.

In case you do not have a calculator handy, allow me to do the math.

The gallon jug contained 128 ounces of fluoride mouthwash. Each dose measures one-half ounce, so that means that there are 256 swigs in the jug.

At thirty-six bucks a dose, that comes out to $9,216.

I do believe Kryptonite is much cheaper, makes your choppers glow in the dark, and gives you superpowers to boot.

By the way, I checked out some dental supply web sites. The jug of mouthwash cost the dentist about $60.

Who said capitalism is dead?

Forget gold coin! The smart money is on fluoride rinse! It's recession-proof and you get an 8,000-percent return on your investment!

On second thought, is there a dental mafia in Columbia nobody is telling us about?

When I picked my jaw up off the floor, being careful not to sully my very clean, very expensive teeth, I asked what -- and why -- the "exam" cost me extra.

(See, I was under the impression that the dentist moseying by after your cleaning -- and swishing -- and peering around inside your mouth and asking the hygienist for the lowdown on the happy-camper quotient of your gums and teeth, was all part of the deal. Silly me.)

"That was $48," replied the book-cooker cashier. "He examined your teeth."

Again I was agog and attempted to argue.

"He looked inside my mouth for all of 90 seconds," I spluttered. "For the rest of the four minutes he was in the room, we talked about the weather! He must make, like, three grand an hour!"

She shrugged and recited automatically: "I think you'll find our prices are competitive."

I don't know about that, but it certainly all added up ... $119 plus $48 plus $36 equals $203.

Still, at $72 an ounce, I might as well swish with Chanel Number Five.

And I can't help but wonder about the street value of that $9,216 bottle of mouthwash.

Before long there will be stories in the news about automobile-trunk fluoride labs.

I'll make it my personal mission to bring the Caped Crusader up to speed on that ... next time I see him around Gotham.

Smile! It's the weekend!

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Reader Comments (9)

They keep coming up with new things to do and to charge us for. Rather than on visit a year, most dentists want you there twice a year. They automatically do x-rays, but now they have a full mouth / jaw x-ray they are pushing, very expensive, on top of everything else. I simply tell them 'no thank you'. I use Crest toothpaste with floride, I haven't had a cavity in 40 years

August 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDebbie

I don't think I've ever had a fluoride rinse. Weird.

August 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSue the Hobbit

I encourage my children to become dentists, think of the beautiful nursing home they could afford to put me in, but noooooooooooo they wanted to be happy in their careers. Hope your mouth feels awesome.

August 26, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterirene

Whew, that is some handsome profit on those extras! My dentist doesn't charge extra for the exam part of the cleaning. And there is no rinse. I hope my dentist doesn't find out about these kind of charges!

August 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDonna M.

What? I thought you told them NO Floride?!!!
I would have argued then gone back and asked the hygenist just WHY she gave me a cup of the foul, life threatening crap to Swish AFTER I had told her NO FLORIDE!Grrrrrr......That stuff is a killer! People are beginning to wake up to the fact that towns that are putting that stuff in our water need to Stop it!

I hate the stuff...can you tell?Hahaaaa
hughugs

August 27, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDonna (Texas)

@Debbie ... good for you, no cavities! TG has never had a cavity and he's nearly 60. I have not been so lucky. I really do like my current dentist. Much better than the old one.

@Hobbit ... not even as a kid? The nurse used to come around to our classrooms and make us swish.

@irene ... LOL kids just don't listen, do they? Seems to me dentistry is the way to go if you want to make big bucks. My mouth does feel awesome.

@Donna M. ... I wish I had your dentist! All the ones around here seem eager to tack on extra charges. Now I won't let them touch me until they've told me exactly what it will cost.

@Donna ... girl you are not paying attention! It was two years ago that I had the experience with the unwanted fluoride rinse. This past week, because I've trained this new dentist very well, they knew better than to offer it to me.

August 27, 2011 | Registered CommenterJennifer

@Jennifer -- I remember having to swish flouride in school when I was a kid, too! We'd line up at the nurse's office and do the swish and spit. Maybe Gov. Perry remembered that too? ;)

I don't get the liquid when I visit the dentist; now it's the powder they grind into your teeth at the end of they exam. At least it has a minty taste or I'd probably gag. I just wish the hygienist hadn't studied at the Josef Mengele school of flossing. Man, that hurts!

However, I do have to say that finding a good dentist is like finding a good car mechanic. It's just trial and error until you get lucky. And I've gotten lucky on both accounts. No matter how much fun I poke at them, I wouldn't give up either of them.

August 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTooMuchTime

@TMT ... hi and thanks for stopping by IHATH my friend! Josef Mengele school of flossing ... ROFL ... I hear you and I have been flossed in that manner. This young crop of hygienists tends to be more simpatico to soft gum tissue that's just been assaulted by sharp instruments! And you are so right about the importance of finding (and keeping) a good dentist. It's more than the cutesy water bottles and Keurig coffeemaker in the lobby (which itself is outfitted with leather sofas and artsy fountains). It's about having a dentist you can trust with both your teeth and your hard-earned money.

August 28, 2011 | Registered CommenterJennifer

Thank you Dear Jenny, for your concern, during Hurricane Irene!

August 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAunt Amelia

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