Remember To Forget ... To Remember
Monday, May 12, 2008 at 10:44PM 
Yesterday TG and I had one of those conversations ... you know, the kind of exchange that people who have been together for thirty years tend to have. It contained many instances of that loaded and lively question ... "Remember?"
Pulling over to park here for a mo ... increasingly as I go about my business I notice that in lots of situations I am the oldest person present. It is not all that unusual for me to be seated at a conference table with two or three lawyers and a deponent, and for every one of them to have been born after (in some cases long after) me. I hope you won't think me conceited when I say that often (but by no means always) I note with no small amount of gratification that although I may be someone's senior in calendar years, I look at least forty-five minutes younger than they. At least I think I do, and if I don't, please no one tell me. This dream world I inhabit suits me just fine (she said with a beatific smile).
She says that she mentally relives her entire past life daily, constantly, in minute detail.
At any rate I can take no credit other than my religious -- yea, near fanatical -- use of sunblock. And possibly a slight genetic advantage ... no, I do not refer to early blindness! I will thank you not to snicker.
When I was the age of these younger people, the thought of being the oldest person in the room would have bothered me ... if I could have envisioned such a scenario back then, which I'm fairly confident would have been beyond my ken. The young think they will always be young. Period. It's part of the charm, the fascination, the pink bubble that is indefatigable youth.
But honestly, y'all ... the older I get, in many ways the younger I feel. And while I don't have that all figured out, I'm good with it. It's true what they say: Youth is wasted on the wrong people. If you are reading this and you have not yet attained an age you consider "old," don't ever let anyone tell you that "old" people don't have fun. It ain't so and you heard it here first.
Not that I am old.
Let's swerve back onto the highway, shall we? That detour took longer than I had planned. I sure hope nobody got off the bus and took a train in the opposite direction ... not that I would necessarily blame them.
After TG and I had verbally reminisced enough to virtually reconstruct an event that took place when we were newlyweds -- an adventure of sorts, with all manner of dangerous twists and turns -- and reconciled our individual recollections of the epic saga as best we could, he asked me if I had heard about the lady who has been in the news lately ... a lady who is unable to forget anything.
I hadn't heard the story, so today I Googled it. Her name is Jill Price. She is forty-two years old and she remembers everything that has happened to her since 1980. You can name a date seventeen years and three months and two days ago, and she can tell you what she wore, what the weather was like, and what she ate for breakfast that day. She says that she mentally relives her entire past life daily, constantly, in minute detail ... while trying to stay afloat in her present life where she works as a school administrator. Of course many scientists have been studying Jill for a number of years, and they have even coined a new term for her condition: hyperthymestic syndrome.
Ms. Price says that while some of her memories are warm and comforting, the problem is that she also remembers in sharp detail every sorrow, every failure, every embarrassment. Anything -- a smell, a few bars of a song, a color -- may trigger a fresh deluge of memories. She has difficulty sleeping at night because she finds it nearly impossible to relax and stop remembering.
I'm glad I can't remember every sorrow, every failure, every embarrassment ... that would put me under the bed and no mistake. The ones I do have a hard time forgetting are plenty to deal with, thank you very much.
And those are just from last week.
Oddly enough, Ms. Price says that while her exhaustive memory is a terrible burden, her worst fear is losing it.
Remind me to count my many blessings before I sleep tonight. Something tells me I won't be able to remember them all.
Reader Comments (13)
Agh! Like you, I've been with my Other Half for over thirty years, and like you I'm convinced I don't look that old (Nobody tell me if I'm wrong, OK?). Now you know roughly how old I am, or at least the area of life I inhabit, so you'll understand when I say that I've been worrying about my forgetfulness lately. But good grief! What must Ms Price have done in her previous life to earn such cruel and unusual punishment? I can't imagine having to live through past misery on a daily basis.
Yikes. Poor woman!
I know ... it's staggering isn't it? We cherish our memories, but I guess a glut of them is just like too much of anything else ... a burden.
Thanks for reading!
I saw this story on the tele. She said she had trouble remembering lists and that she couldn't study as a child. She could only remember things about her life. I think it is because as a child she focused on that and for some reason she decided to pay close attention to what happened to her. It became a habit and a way of life. That's my theory on it, anyway. Just like those little Japanese 2 and 3 year olds that can play Beethoven's symphonies flawlessly. It may not have been there decision so much as what was forced on them or repeatedly shown to them, but it became a habit and years later they are perfectionists at it.
I read this story and I can't help but think, wouldn't it be nice if people like that could "lend" some of their memory skills to people who are losing their memory? I bet they wouldn't miss it, just a little bit of it...!
RYC: Drool is not good for your keyboard, no...might want to get a spit cup! ;)
@ Robyn ... you may have something there!
@ Angi ... mercy, yes ... I forget why I walked into a room. If what you say is true, I think my keyboard is toast! Your solution may be just the thing.
RYC 1: I bet she'll love the cupcakes! They're super easy and fun, and you can do whatever colors you want. They even make food coloring in "neon gel" colors so they'd REALLY look like play-doh!!
RYC 2: Completely agree with you on Oprah and Barbara...lots of 'splainin'.
I can't wait to make them! I'll be sure to take pictures to share!
That was a great post about O and B. They're grade-A idiots.
RYC: You're right!! I forgot a couple things. Although I prefer International Delight. ;-)
And regarding Johnny Depp - apart from being good looking, he is a phenomenal actor. How many actors can play SO many different parts and end up actually being believable? From What's Eating Gilbert Grape to Blow to Pirates 1-3 to Sweeney Todd...wow.
Wow indeed ... he was so good in all those parts ... then there's Finding Neverland ... aaahhhh! Can't wait to see him "be" John Dillinger!
Hi Jenny! Love this post on housekeeping! I used to be a fanatic about keeping the place clean... now? Ha! But see, now it has that cozy look and feel to it, a "lived in" look, you know? Isn't that more important? (sounded good to me...)
Ok, I'll admit it! I'm 50 and awful darn glad I made it this far! So what if I posted a comment on the wrong post? My comment on housekeeping was meant for ..."you've got the floor" post! Does that make me an ignoramus? Ha! Ok, does this comment need anything else said? Or will it "fit in" with the post "remember to forget...."??? Need I say more?
It's all good, Darla! No worries, mate! Just glad you joined us. You were distracted by the Rasberry Ants, no doubt ...
She needs to remember to forget!