When The Moon Hits Your Eye
Monday, June 9, 2008 at 10:44PM 
I heard about this a few weeks ago and printed out the news article so I could remind myself to blog about it when I had time. During an impromptu dig today on the archaeological excavation site that is my desk, as I feverishly searched for clues to my past (like yesterday), I unearthed the article.
It's about lunar therapy.
Specifically, it's about an innovative and apparently highly scientific method of imparting therapeutic doses of moonshine ... uhm, that didn't sound right ... moonbeams to people who might experience health benefits from such a practice.
I am much more comfortable with the concept of basking for the asking than I am with folks having to produce a credit card in order to let the moon shine on them.
Interstellar Light Applications (ILA for short), the brainchild of "lifelong science buff" Richard Chapin and his wife, Monica, of Arizona, has been open for business since May of 2006.
And people are howling for it.
They line up in the desert west of Tucson on nights when there is a full moon, waiting for a turn to stand 100 feet from a massive mirrored "collector" and be bathed in concentrated moonlight. They believe it can cure common maladies such as asthma and, they are hopeful, cancer. Cancer patients are now trekking to the desert for regularly scheduled "moonlight events."
Does this remind you of a Steven Spielberg movie?
Although one TV news report had the Chapins charging $25 per ten-minute moonbath, causing me to guffaw out loud and almost swallow a chocolate chip cookie whole, a second online report (I am all about thorough research) states that the service, for now, is free because the device's inventors "can't justify asking people to pay until they have the scientific evidence to back up the benefits." Ahem ... I mean, Amen. I am much more comfortable with the concept of basking for the asking than I am with folks having to produce a credit card in order to let the moon shine on them.
But when you read about the Interstellar Light Collector on the ILA website, you begin to understand how big a deal this is. The "parabolic non-imaging optical collector" is 52 feet high, 60 feet across, and weighs 50 tons. It rotates 360 degrees for handy alignment with the moon's position in the sky and has 84 reflectors, each adjusted individually to make the most of available moonbeams.
I guess it was intended as sort of a giant lunar tanning bed but it sounds like a really cool makeup mirror to me. We Southern girls are legendary for pairing moonlight with our magnolias anyway. Moonlight is, after all, hillbilly botox.
I wonder if standing in the path of the collector makes gentlemen callers many times more likely to propose marriage?
I wish the Chapins every success with their venture but my advice to them is, if it fails as a medical phenomenon, bill it as a mega-superpowered romance-inducer. Talk about a cash cow. People will come from far and wide. They'll have to put a velvet rope on the door to the desert west of Tucson and hire the Michelin Man as a bouncer (because he looks all moon-white and space-agey). Have a string ensemble on hand and get somebody with a cushy voice to croon songs like Moonlight Serenade and That's Amore. Vastly therapeutic.
Cupid will have a field day.
Reader Comments (14)
LOL you crack me up, will have to remember your line about hillbilly botox. I remember being taught as a child, "if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is". Sadly many people didn't learn that and go chasing after the latest and newest scam.
Wow. This sheds a lot of light on the word moonshine. I bet the astronauts are extremely healthy.
Oh, and I can swallow a chocolate chip cookie whole without the aid of shock and awe. :)
Love your blog!
@ Elaine ... that's right girl. The Bible says a fool and his money are soon parted.
@ Leeuna ... hey! That's a moon name, LOL! Yeah, the astronauts must be feeling no pain whatsoever. And I guess one of them real soft choc-chip cookies would go down in one gulp if you chased it with enough RC Cola.
Thanks for reading and commenting!
I laughed at the hillbilly Botox line too.
I heard about this a couple of months ago. I don't know, it sounds like the old snake oil peddlers to me. Let's just say I'm not flying out to Tucson until I hear something more solid in the way of evidence.
On the other hand, my brother and sister-in-law just returned from a vacation to go see the moonbow (rainbow by moonlight) on the Cumberland Falls in Kentucky. I guess it's one of only two places in the world that have the phenomenon. (I'm doing this from memory, so don't sue me if I got the details wrong.) That sounds like a moonshine experience worth having. And in Kentucky, you might be able to find the other moonshine too!
Hi Jenny! I've never heard of the phrase "hillbilly botox", but I think I'll have to give it a shot! Ha! This scientific experiment is new to me. I have a brother who lives in Phoenix... I may ask him to visit Tuscan and check it out for me!
I haven't had a whole lot of internet time in the last few days, so I apologize for not visiting your site daily. I'll try to do the "meme" tonight. It's my first... I've never been tagged before! Ha! Thanks!
@ Ruth ... ditto on the snake oil part! And I too would love to see the rainbow by moonlight, even if I had to go to Kentucky to do it! LOL!
@ Darla ... no worries, luv. Yes, moonlight can be very forgiving to aging faces. I try to stand in it often but unfortunately when I do, TG is in the house.
Just amazing! I can see a collection plate going around, even though ILA is free for now. I'd love to talk to some of those people in line...
Me too, Keli! I mean, at the very least I'd like to interview the kind of people who might actually think getting blasted by concentrated moonlight will cure what ails them. Sorry but I don't get it.
This certainly would explain why werewolves are so strong and healthy...
It certainly would, Kev! Most insightful point you make there. I've never seen a sickly werewolf.
I love the film 'Moonstruck' with Cher and Nicholas Cage - especially the bit where the old grandfather takes all his dogs to howl at the moon - and the old couple get - how shall I put this - frisky - because of the full moon.:)
I must remember the 'hillbilly botox'routine - much cheaper than the real thing....
I like that movie too, Diane! Now that's what I call lunar therapy!
Since I tend to drive vehicles until the wheels fall off (or I bury them in the sides of larger vehicles), it's been 5 years since I've last had to negotiate the treacherous shoals of a car lot.
Not sure if Hillbilly botox has some connection hyar, but does it help fill in teeth? Might work on a damaged vehicle grill, or I just digress ;-)
I think everyone's teeth look nicer by moonlight, Skunkfeathers! Much whiter and straighter ... so yes. And "treacherous shoals" ... yeah that pretty much sums up car shopping! Best let folks know where you're going just in case you run aground and need rescuing.
Thanks for reading!